Hilarious Christmas Goofs and GigglesBy Anglina Roberts
Fa-la-la-la-la, Christmas time is supposed to be about gifts and eggnog with family and friends. But what would the holidays really be without a hearty dose of humor? It’s time to expose the silliest Xmas jokes, pranks, and surprises. And a few memes, too!
Oh, Little Town of Bacon-Ham
Today one porky tradition meets another, with this novel nativity project. Salt-cured, smoky, and holy all in one, this meat-tastic diorama really makes a festive statement!
Examining the handiwork here, hotdog wise men, sausage logs, and a bacon roof all come together for the ultimate Christmas scene. But will it survive the holiday? Might just be too mouth-watering to leave unattended!
Next: See the holiday moments that made Santa ho, ho, ho right in his Christmas boots!
A Man With a Holiday Plan
Yes, the holidays are fast approaching. How does that old song go? He doesn’t want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing that he needs. Make his wish come true, people: All he wants for Christmas is a Latina girlfriend! Helpfully, an email is provided for any local mamacitas!
Sure, it seems like a lot. In the age of swipe apps and online dating, a formal ad placement over traffic doesn’t strike most as a necessary step. But judging by his vintage AOL email, he may not have gotten the tech memo. Marc, it’s 2020!
With millions around the world anxiously awaiting their holiday deliveries, Dasher, Dancer, Cupid, Donner, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, and Blitzen are not available this year. That’s right, none of them! As a last-minute fill-in, these two kitties are trying to deliver the goods. But are they even paying attention?
Seems not, to no one’s surprise. Most cats don’t like leashes, let alone reigns with work expectations. But the twins above hope that their felines are willing to comply for the sake of Christmas. They’re temperamental pets, sure. But they’re not grinches!
Homeless for the Holidays
Gingerbread house building is a delicious, crunchy tradition for kids and moms everywhere. Typically, a good structure requires a combo of cookies, frosting, and gumdrops for decoration. Then, it’s all about assembling a good base and a striking design. What happened to this crumbling model, though?
It’s in disrepair, but there’s a reason for the neglect: Looks like financial problems, after black Friday! Mr. gingerbread man is probably running fast as he can, right to the bank. Even for a cookie, foreclosed is no way to spend the holidays!
Jingling with Dwayne Johnson
America’s favorite former WWE wrestler is definitely The Rock, aka Dwayne Johnson. The big man has had a long enough career that many might forget how things really started. This Christmas, it’s time for a festive flashback. Take a look at vintage Dwyane!
The ’90s have been making a comeback in fashion, but that always means the best of an era. Here, the worst of the decade is all over his greeting card, posted on Instagram. From the fanny pack to the dad jeans, this is a real ghost from Xmas past!
Bad Tidings to You
Sitting on Santa’s lap is not only a time to whisper ideas to the big man. It’s also a chance to take timeless family photography, and it’s double trouble today! Here, two identical tots pose for the camera. How do their Xmas attitudes differ?
The girl on the right seems amused by her sis on the left, who has a decidedly negative opinion. Maybe she never agreed to this stunt and wants mom to know it. Twins this cute are probably forced into way too many pics, as it ’tis!
The midwest is a special place, far away from the North Pole. It’s pretty snowy, though it’s not officially arctic. Investigators have discovered that there’s even a local Santa, doing his thing! An impostor, to be sure. But he’s easy to mix up, at first glance!
Lately, he has been delivering gifts from a lawnmower, wearing shades to disguise his true identity. The decapitated animals on the front of his fake sleigh are not Donner, Prancer, Vixen, Dasher, Dancer, Cupid, Comet, or Blitzen. Luckily, they are just leftover hunting trophies from deer season!
Modern life has arrived, friends. The smartphone is a necessity, and laptops are not up for negation. These days, people have a lot of electronics. But for extra luxury no one actually needs, a tablet is the next buy! Who doesn’t prefer an iPad, despite the price?
Despite all the holiday hopes and dreams of this gift recipient, it’s just not happening. But the prank here is a little over the top! Getting their hopes up with an authentic Apple box, but presenting them with eye-pads? At least they will be able to refresh after sobbing all eve!
Wrapping gifts for Xmas is a great way to get into the holiday spirit. Creative kids can choose between matte, sparkly, shiny, or bright paper in that old knick-knack closet. No one ever opens the door, but it’s full of wrap for just such an occasion!
Still, brother didn’t want to make things too easy for his sis. Using a combination of paper and zip tie, he decided to forgo scotch tape. Now it’s so safe that it requires a security expert to open it in time for Christmas!
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Justin
Well, well, well. If it isn’t a familiar face, just in time for Xmas. Even when he was dancing around in NSYNC, people could see the truth. Justin Timberlake thinks his girl needs somethin’ real. Something from the heart, something special girl. And it’s going to be presented in a box!
Fans of his recent work remember the method well: One, cut a hole in a box. Two, put that junk in a box. Three, she opens the box on Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, every single holiday. Just how is Jessica Biel holding up, though? That’s a lot of boxes, JT!
Sure, Santa’s activities are well known in December. And people know he resides in the North Pole making toys for tots all year round. But has anyone checked in to see what the man does on vacation? The paparazzi tracked him down, and it will be surprising to many!
All along, Santa has been a surfer at heart. Riding those waves is too chilly where he comes from, of course. It totally makes sense to migrate south for his secret passion, like so many in the offseason. Kowabunga, Kringle!
James and Seth Celebrate
According to actor Seth Rogan: “It’s always funny to find what people’s button is.” While he and friend James Franco are actually Hannukah celebrators, it doesn’t mean they don’t have a passion for Christmas cards! Here, both join Santa for a special moment to send to mom, dad, and colleagues — whether they like it, or not!
Looking closely, it appears that both gentlemen have forgotten all of their clothes. Looking way too closely, it is clear that includes their briefs! Thankfully, two giant Christmas socks are available for maximum coverage. Santa often has occupational hazards many may not expect!
Just Spelling it Out
Sometimes, truth in labeling really doesn’t live up to its promise. Today is a lucky day: That letdown is not about to happen. For the holidays, why not try some bell-shaped bells? Whatever the case may be, they are not going to be shaped like anything else. Exactly as they should be!
From ringing to clinging, these are sure to perform quite nicely around the house. Gold bows really enhance the bell experience, too. With 21 of these babies, any clear-eyed, conscious buyers can expect to have a real jingle, all the way!
Claus Vs. Colonel
Colonel Sanders is the face of Kentucky Fried Chicken, beloved by one and all. Anyone who has ever tried his finger lickin’ good drumsticks has real gratitude for his recipes. That makes it all the more odd to see Santa Claus himself attacking the man in public, and so viciously!
The truth is, most have experienced less than stellar service at a fast food joint before. But getting an order wrong is no excuse for violence. Santa may have high expectations coming from the world of magic, but this is NYC!
Delta Kappa Kringle
Santa Claus is rarely accused of being a social butterfly. He is probably more of a workaholic and a recluse, if anything. But this year, two fraternity boys have decided to initiate the bearded man into a new social clique. Behold, the newest pledge!
To his credit, there aren’t a lot of parties going on where he comes from. It’s just Santa and the missus, most of the time. Today is a new chapter, and as a member of a chapter: He’s happy, he’s jolly, he’s messed up by golly!
Ho, Ho, Typo
Everyone knows that when Santa comes down the chimney, he likes to stop and snack. That’s why people leave a plate of cookies and milk for the red guy every year. Today, though, it seems that something else is for sale: Cookies for Satan, his arch-nemesis!
Some may ask: What is the favorite flavor of the dark prince, these days? Logically, it would probably be devil’s food. But this is a sale, and beggars can’t be choosers. Clearance rarely involves the most popular items, at rock bottom prices. Leftovers, it is!
A Very Arson Xmas
In the spirit of cheer, it’s time to twinkle. Most of the time, Christmas lights rely on three power sources: batteries, solar, or the ole’ plug-a-roo. But now, it seems there is another choice: For only $13.44, why not try hot, flammable lighter fluid?
Well, many people would say there are great reasons to stick with tradition. But for the pyromaniacs out there, this sale might just be the sign they were waiting for. Literally, and figuratively: It’s a sign from Walmart, and a signal from satan — an impressive 2 for 1!
Joy to the Toilet
It’s been a blast opening gifts, year after year. But what about opening the toilet? Maybe it’s time to make taking a Christmas break on the john just as festive as everything else during the season. Obviously, that requires expertise. But it’s not impossible!
With a careful snip and tuck, that old bowl can be easily transformed into something cheerful and inviting. In this attempt posted online, a helpful elf was added to guard the toilet paper. All that’s needed to complete the mood is a toasty cinnamon candle! In summary: 9/10.
Silly Santa Puss
Santa Claus has had many names and depictions over the centuries around the world. From Father Christmas to Saint Nicholas, to Kris Kringle, the man is legendary. In every case, he has a kind spirit and seems to love bringing presents to children. Until today, that is!
Santa looks downright grumpy, and he isn’t trying to hide that from the camera. Whether it was too many sleigh rides, dirty chimneys, or aggressive house dogs along the way, the man looks downright done with his duties this year. And for whatever reason, he’s now communicating by meow!
All Wrapped Up
Practical jokes are usually the purview of April first, but Christmas is not immune from hijinks. For anyone with a trickster in the family, Santa sneaking down the chimney may be the least of the surprises after bedtime. Imagine waking up in the morning to find the fridge like this!
A quick glance reveals skilled work: The milk, the eggs, the bread, the yogurt are just gone. It’s all concealed, so perfectly. The question remains: Which household resident pranked the kitchen? Blaming this on elves is not going to work, realistically!
Away in a Manger
The story of Christmas would not be complete without a visit to the manger and that famous, simple inn. As the tale went, Mary and Joe slept there for just a night and got a visit from three wise men. But didn’t they have a baby, originally?
Indeed, they did have a human baby. But when have cats ever cared about following the rules when a basket or box is involved? Their instinct is to sit inside! Silent night, holy night. All is meow, all is meow. Sleep in heavenly peace, kitty.
Some Poo for You
December 24 really has it all. Gifts, songs, lights, and now — elves on shelves. What is this, some may ask. Popular in recent years, the elf on a shelf gimmick scares children into thinking a figurine reports naughty or nice behavior back to Santa directly. ‘Tis perfect!
The little guy sneaks around every day leading up to the holiday. Today, he’s guarding the morning cocoa puffs. But he claims they are turds from Santa’s pets! Maybe they are, really. Maybe magical reindeer really do rain down chocolate as they fly?
What a Naughty Bear
As mother nature intended, polar bears live in the arctic. But like Santa and his reindeer, they love to make an appearance on the mainland for Christmas. Here, a family of six poses to make things seem snowy for shoppers, indoors. Isn’t something is a bit off, though?
Perhaps from any other angle, things would look perfectly PG-rated. But from the front, there’s a lot going on in the back! Will anyone be brave enough to call the manager? In between the giggles, surely someone will do the right thing!
Jolly Joe Jonas
Truthfully, there may be too many Jonas brothers to count, these days. But the reality is, Joe-the-middle-bro has been creating Christmas cards to one-up the rest of them. Take a look at this mysterious scene, explained by the singer as follows: ”It’s getting cold. Cuddle up with a kitten.”
Alright, Joe. The caption on social media did not explain his artistic motivation particularly well. But fans loved it anyway, rating it high on the weirdness test. For a fellow known as a cookie-cutter pop singer, odd might be a welcome change!
Sure, mom always does her best to create an atmosphere around the tree. Novelty ornaments and brightly wrapped gifts are all part of the cheer. The lights twinkle, the snow sprinkles. That’s all well and good. But why not try a little mayhem this year?
Here, someone seized on a real opportunity with movable blocks. Who knew that Merry Christmas had a secret code, just waiting to come out? He wonders how long he will get away with it. But of course, that’s not the goal. These blocks are meant to be noticed!
St. Nick, Coming Quick
Sure, the magic sleigh is a great way to get around the world in a wink. But all vehicles need to be sent to the shop for repairs, at some point. How does the indispensable Santa Claus travel in a hurry, when the reindeer are resting?
He jumps from the clouds, if all else fails! And he does so safely, with a big, red parachute. It’s not practical, for every trip, but it works in a holly, jolly emergency. Always prepared with plan B, Santa gives his delivery guarantee for Xmas eve!
It’s a Vacuum
Gift wrapping is an important part of the holiday process. It’s not required, but there is something about a layer of paper that heightens the surprise for the receiver. Here, someone wants to give a practical gift to their beloved. It’s a vacuum cleaner! Be honest: How’d they do?
It’s well wrapped, to be sure. Maybe cleaning the house will be more exciting, from now on! Or maybe, simply seeing the gift will excite in new, unexpected ways. Or expected, secretly. Someone here is being naughty or nice, but it’s hard to tell!
Tinsel in the Tropics
Christmas is a holiday celebrated all over the world. Despite the snow associated with most imagery, there are plenty of cities in warm climates looking to bring cheer to residents. Here, a local home tried to decorate a palm tree. They achieved color and lights, but it’s been receiving complaints! Why, oh why?
Looking at this far away is no better than looking at it at close range. Putting it plainly: The lighting is downright phallic! There is no traditional symbolism and no hidden meaning. It is what it is. Homeowners association, take note!
Exactly as Described
The online shopping craze has only become a norm in recent years. Amazon is taking over the world, and other shops have tried to compete with their own quick deliveries. Today, it’s time to leave a product review. A nasty one, just in time for the holidays!
In the picture, a fluffy base of pine went all the way up to the ceiling with green, green, and more green. In real life, the family received a Dr. Suess replica. Close just isn’t going to cut it, for the most magical evening of the year!
Under the Mistletoe
Mrs. Claus certainly doesn’t know this is going on. Some warn that a husband constantly traveling for business can be a risky relationship move. Here, two young Santa fans have crowded the chair. They want to let him know just how much they appreciate his work. According to their tees, he’s not only a stud muffin, but a cutie pie!
Sure, this seems totally inappropriate for a man who has been married for hundreds of years. But what the old lady doesn’t know, doesn’t hurt her: Ho, ho, ho has had another meaning all along!
Yummy in His Tummy
Most families know the drill: Christmas eve, cookies and milk. It’s just a good courtesy to leave Santa a snack on his laborious journey down millions of chimneys. This time though, it looks like someone was a little stingy. Time to learn a lesson!
Bones picked clean and only a trace of sauce left behind, the scene is gruesome. Is this real? The big red man has left a note, to make sure no there’s no confusion about the matter. Yes, he had the sweets. But look at the main course!
Have a Scary, Beary Xmas
The atmosphere at the mall during the holiday season is really like no other time. Some might say, it’s the happiest time of the year! But today, the public display at the local shopping center seems to be bringing more chill than cheer. These bears are downright bone-chilling!
While they may look plush and cuddly from far away, no one should get up close and personal. It’s just something in their eyes, really. Was this a mixup for December and October? If anything, these figures were designed for Halloween!
Santa’s Little Helper
The factory up at the north pole is well known to be the home of elves, manufacturing toys year-round. Up there, labor laws don’t seem to apply. But outsourcing on the mainland for special missions, Santa often has recruiting problems. Who is this temp, working the holiday hours?
Doggo is in full Xmas uniform, a good sign since he’s trying to be professional. But he may not have manners down yet to the standard Santa would expect from his reps. With that sloppy tongue, no wonder he’s been put in the stock room!
Walking in a Winter Weinerland
Holly is the plant that Europeans decided was on the thorny crown, in the bible. It’s stuck around as a popular decoration, even for secular Christmas. Perhaps people don’t even know its origin anymore. And perhaps they have also forgotten how to illustrate it, as seen here!
But it’s hard to believe a graphic designer would be this lazy, in the age of the internet. Any idea can be double-checked, cross-referenced, and verified. Truthfully, that may lead many residents to one conclusion: It was planned to be lewd, exactly like this!
She Wanted Loafers
Making a wish list for Christmas is a nice way of letting friends and family know what you actually need. No one wants doubles, do they? This woman certainly didn’t, and she wrote down her dream to wear new shoes this season. Loafers, specifically!
It appears her curse this Xmas is about literal meanings. A Christmas criminal decided that loaf and loafers were related, somehow. They seem to know she was asking for footwear. And yet, they combined the concepts. Someone call the fashion police before the evidence is eaten!
Streaking All the Way
Everyone knows the iconic outfit of the red man, by now. Santa has a signature style, and he’s hard to miss in full uniform. But what does he look like under the robe? Truthfully, few have thought about the matter. Too many people found out in a total TMI, here!
That big belly was always a challenge to hide, and it is on full display here in town. Too many cookies, perhaps? Too much passive sitting in the sleigh? With all that chimney shimmying, one would think Santa could keep his figure!
She Sure Does
Ugly Christmas sweaters used to be unironic holiday wear. But ever since people noticed how fun they were to mock, it’s become a very ironic tradition all on its own. Here, someone has finished a DIY knit with a special message. Look closely, it’s delightful!
To clarify, it’s delightful for the person wearing it. Not the viewer! No one wants to see this message, least of all on a cheery evening. It’s disturbing, inappropriate, and unwelcome! And for that reason, it’s the perfect ugly Xmas sweater. Peace on Earth, and hopefully at this party!
Grumpy Cat Greetings
The puss that broke the internet is certainly the one and only Grumpy Cat. Few have noticed the years fly by, but he has passed on in real life since his online debut. Before his ascent to pet heaven, he celebrated quite a few Christmases!
Like most moments in his life, there’s plenty of photographic evidence. Grouchy and cranky as usual, the best part about him shines through in the pic. Here, he dons a little cap, just like Santa. Does he look happy about it? No, he’s still Grumpy Cat!
Yoo Hoo, Peekaboo
Decorating the Christmas tree is a time-honored tradition for good reason. Sparkling lights have a special magic in the living room during the happiest time of year. Ornaments of all shapes and sizes are a big part of the charm, too. What has this family selected?
A few gingerbread men, cookie bells, beads, and an elf are a great start to the project. But zoom in, and there’s something else hiding in the tree. It’s going to be a very kitty Christmas this year, whether they know it or not!
Conan Visits the Big Man
Late-night show host Conan O’Brien always makes viewers laugh. Some ask: Isn’t it time that he does Santa the same favor? So far, he’s tried! He posted on social media: “I met Santa at the Macy’s in Seattle. He’s now suing me for breaking his femur.”
Ho, ho, ho Conan. You joker, you! While the comedian is unusually tall at 6’4″, he’s a pretty skinny guy. No one would believe he’s heavy enough for an accident like that. And Santa would never sue a fan on the nice list!